Just levelling for now but feel free to interrupt for some fun and fantasy.


She snapped her gum with a 'pop' and leaned closer over the table with a grin.

"So there I was, skirt up over my ass and what felt like a foot and a half of dick up my poor little cooch getting banged silly for a tank of gas and a six pack"

She paused to watch the bartender walk across the floor then turned back to the elf sitting across from her.

"I swear this guy never got fucked before in his life, he came in like three seconds but he didn't stop, bastard wouldn't get off me until he came at least twice more.
I lost count how many I got, all I know is I left a trail for him to wipe up and I had a hard time getting my leg over the bike when I finally made it out. Fucker was hung like a buffalo, he was up in my guts so far he was stirring my breakfast !!"

"What's a bike ? umm..let's see...it's sort of like a two wheeled cart, except it doesn't have the cart part and the wheels aren't on the sides.  One wheel's in front of the other one, then there's a motor in between them and a saddle on top of that so you can ride it.  I guess it's sort of like a horse but you don't have to feed it hay, you put gas in the motor sort of like oil in a lamp and it burns that to make the wheels move, well the back one anyway, gas isn't cheap anymore so when I got an offer to pay for it with something besides money, it seemed like a good idea" she closed her eyes and shook her head "I didn't know superdick wanted me to pay that much though" she opened her eyes again "but it was fun...mostly"

She stretched her legs out and continued

"So I'm on the bike headed down the road for the next show, I miss that bike, she's a candy apple red '73 shovelhead chopped trike with a matching trailer for my show stuff, pretty and fast too.  Anyway, I've got my feet up on the pegs getting my cooch some air after the little bitch got mugged then pounded half to death and almost drowned, no idea where my underwear got to, I bet that gas station guy kept them for a souvenir, when the sky starts getting dark and all of a sudden I can't see a thing for dust"

"I had to pull over, helluva sandstorm, right out of nowhere, and when the sky cleared up it turned funny colors, all swirling pink and purple, then I got so dizzy I passed out.   I thought that guy must have put like acid or something in the gumballs, probably the only way he gets laid, but when I opened my eyes, no bike !! no nothing !! just this place, then my fingers started to itch like crazy until fire shot out of them, can you imagine that ? I can do lightning too now, wanna see ?"

"Anyway, that's how I ended up here with nothing but what I was wearing and a pocket full of gumballs.  You're a nice listener, wanna help me scratch another itch ? There won't be any fire there but I know how I can keep those ears warm"

"Oh, my name's Hawliegh, Hawliegh Devisen" she winced a little "my old man's idea but you wouldn't get it so call me Hawggie"


Not too short, not too tall, all black leather and bad attitude with a mane of red hair you could hide a goblin in and a swagger to her slim little hips that could knock a dwarf over with one good bump.

The only thing she likes better than riding her bike is riding another biker.  Or an elf, or whoever, she isn't picky, she just gets really, really horny sometimes and her bike didn't make the trip anyway.