Your only hope for fame and fortu--

*sounds of a door being kicked in, a struggle between two people, some fisticuff sound effects before a heavy thud and foot steps scrape along the floor. A subtle sniff, patting on soft clothes, before some furniture is dragged around. The grunt of a man dropping into a chair, and a rumble of a growl.*

So, this is how it'll be. Forget the narrator; he's just taking a nap. Don't worry, everything's gonna be alright, folks. The Show has yet to begin.........