There is something unusual about this woman. Her teeth are perfect: white, not even slightly crooked or broken. She doesn't even have any warts or boils, and only one small, fashionable scar on the right jaw. She still has all her limbs and fingers, without any signs of deformity. Her clothes, while worn, are generaly clean and not at all foul-smelling. And she hasn't got shit all over her.
Clearly she must be royalty in disguise.

Reds: Anything you can think of. And everything you can't, too.